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My Heart
My heart feels raw like a days old wound That refuses ever to heal Under the smile I put on my face Are emotions I don’t want to feel Sometimes it seems it’s all gotten better And I’ve moved on from the pain Then something happens to rip the scab off And I’m back to
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Riding the roller coaster
One bold message in the Book of Job is that you can say anything to God. Throw at him your grief, your anger, your doubt, your bitterness, your betrayal, your disappointment – he can absorb them all… – Philip Yancey My poor husband. Yes, he had betrayed my trust and broken my heart. But the
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The will of God
In my mind there are two ways to look at the will of God and marriage. Either you prayed through before getting married, and you knew this person was God’s choice for you; or you didn’t – but now that you are married this IS God’s will for you. I believe it is your part
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The God who sees
And she called the name of the LORD that spake unto her, Thou God seest me…. – Gen. 16:13 Something I did not expect from dealing with overcoming HB’s porn disclosure was how it would affect other relationships – not just my marriage. This is obviously a circumstance that one does not go around divulging
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Home
Home is where the heart is That’s what they say But it’s hard to find the place Where your heart comes to stay And what if in this home The heart gets battered, bruised and torn? What if instead of safety Comes pain like never before? I’ll tell you what can happen If to your
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Accountability
Accountability is a helpful key to recovering from a pornography addiction. In my opinion there should be both accountability partners and accountability software in place. I know that this was so important for our journey – especially in the early days when I was so afraid of it happening again. Knowing we had some safeguards
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Books
You and your husband should do your best to establish a devotional life together. Praying together and reading either the Bible or a devotional together will strengthen your bond. We have been reading Night Light: A Devotional for Couples by Dr. James and Shirley Dobson but I know there are many other options out there.
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Word Study: Hope
At times in my personal Bible study I have taken a particular word or phrase and gone through a concordance looking up Scriptures mentioning it, plus what commentaries have to say on these verses. Here are my study notes for Scriptures about HOPE “But if we hope for that we see not, then do we
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Still broken
What happens when you start to feel like things are getting better and then all the sudden you are completely derailed emotionally? So many moments like this have come upon my marriage. I think my trust in HB has been rebuilt to the point of healing emotionally, and then something sideswipes my marriage and I
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Hearts don’t break around here…
This may be a little controversial amongst Holiness people, but HB and I like to send each other love songs. We have both gone through the process of letting worldly music go and allowing God to sanctify that area of our lives. I can now, as a married woman, listen to things I would not